And don't you know I love it? It just kind of hit me this morning as I was walking 'Jane' to school with 'Amber' in the stroller. I passed so many moms doing the exact same thing! lol. I don't know how I would have felt about this a few years ago. Truth be told, I never really felt like I fit in around here. I was never the type to really try. But here I am, doing what I want to do without the influence of outside forces, and I find myself suddenly "there".
Life is so often compared to road trips that it's becoming cliche. There is a saying that goes something like, "If you don't know where you're going, it doesn't matter where you end up." Life is like that in so many ways. But, even if you don't have a clear road map, or step-by-step goals, you can still get to where you're going in life--unlike a road trip. (Can you just imagine trying to get across the country with no more thought than "I'd like to go to the beach today. . ."?) But at the same time, if you have too vague an idea you'll still never get to where you want to go. I think that's how we can define the difference between knowing where you want to go, and maybe just knowing where you don't want to go.
I'm living proof. I didn't set out to 'fit-in' with the soccer moms, the triathlete moms, or even the Born Organized moms. And I probably never really will. But today was a sort of vindication that I must be doing something right! My kids may not ever want so many extra-circulars, and I'm not going to force them. I hate exercise and only do what I need to be healthy, so triathlons are out. And no one would ever mistakenly call me a Born Organized person. But walking my kids to school today, with all of those other moms felt so right. Not because I'm trying to gain membership into some exclusive club. It's because I felt I had reached a small, tangible milestone I could set my marker by. Something to indicate I'm on the right path, headed in the direction I want to go, and doing something "right" even if it's the only thing I do get right today.
My journey is far from over--not that it really will ever end. But that's what makes it so wonderful-- this gift called life. There isn't a set point that it becomes too late to change course. And while I might have figured out a few parenting "secrets" sooner than some, that doesn't mean I don't make mistakes or that it's too late for anyone else. My biggest struggles lie elsewhere. But I'm working on those too. So while I'm kind of starting from little more than scratch in the parenting department, all I can say to you is that you will spend time where your heart truly is. And if you spend your time trying to get better at parenting, look for the little things along the way.
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